Influence

Influence, which is the power to affect others negatively or positively, is a powerful force. None of us go through life without being influenced by our family dynamics, past or present. Some of us have had less healthy home environments than others, while none of us have had a perfect family situation.

The bottom line is that everyone is influenced by people and those closest to us can affect us the most for good or bad.

Think about your family members or other people who are closest to you. Consider not only the influence they have had on you, but also the influence you have had on them. Throughout our lives, we are influenced by people’s attitude, character and example in the same way we influence others through our attitude, character and example. 

How we live out our lives doesn’t just affect us it influences others as well. Our lives are an example to others. We all make choices as we respond to life’s challenges or painful experiences, but how we respond is always within the context of the relationships. It is easy to think that our choices only impact us, but others are also influenced for good or bad. 

If someone struggles with their mental health, alcohol, codependency, anger, suicide, or other challenges, the people closest are also influenced. We do not live out our lives in isolation. If someone is hurting and struggling, the people closest may not suffer in the same way but they are definitely influenced. In the same way, when we heal, grow and recover it has a positive influence on our relationships. 

Some of us had family secrets growing up; some of us have secrets now. This happens when someone is struggling with a behaviour, a challenge or a trauma and it is kept hidden. Hidden secrets still have influence. Those closest to the struggling person may be aware, but often the issue isn’t talked about because of fear, shame or denial. The secret is there, and it influences those closest to the suffering person, but often we learn to carry on as if everything is fine. A secret even one that is not talked about is still there. It may be hidden from others, but the influence is still very much at work.

We cannot change our past, or fix other people, but can choose to recover ourselves. When we choose to grow spiritually, heal emotionally, and live our lives with integrity openly in the way God designed, we bring a healthy influence on others. Those around us may not change, but we can change the way that we respond to them. We can take responsibility for our part in a relationship and choose to live confidently in God and in the freedom that He offers us. 

Not only do people have influence, but God has influence through His Word and His Spirit. His powerful influence transforms our lives for good. When we make a decision to turn our lives and will over to the care of God through Christ, we can experience the greatest, most important influence through a growing personal relationship with Him. 

As we move into this new year, we may not be able to change the influence of others, but we can choose how we will respond to that influence. We can also choose the kind of influence we will have on others. Working the Biblical Steps and Principles of Celebrate Recovery will help us grow spiritually, mature emotionally and experience the abundant life that Jesus came to give us. As we move forward into 2021, we can inspire hope and bring an influence of spiritual health and recovery to others by our example!

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